Day 53

"There is nothing in the world so much like prayer as music is." 

William P. Merrill

"Why waste money on psychotherapy when you can listen to the B Minor Mass?" 

Michael Torke

"If a composer could say what he had to say in words he would not bother trying to say it in music."

Gustav Mahler 

"Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life."

Berthold Auerbach

"A painter paints pictures on canvas.  But musicians paint their pictures on silence."

Leopold Stokowski    

 

"Without music life would be a mistake."

Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

What would the world be like without music? Thank goodness we'll never have to find out. It would really never even be possible anyway. Because as long as there is life...as long as there is energy even, there will movement, there will be sound. And as long as there is sound...there will always be music.

Music is a big part of my life. Always has been. Though I am not a musicians myself...but growing up in the theater, I was always surrounded by it. My mom sang in the choir at church and I followed suite...singing in the children's choir, then musicals with the teen choir. Actually, come to think of it, my involvement with the church choirs were really what carried me over in to theater in the first place. (I am so grateful to Southwest Christian Church, James White, and the youth group for that.) I played saxophone for two years in middle school...first chair the whole time! The only reason I quit was to join the 8th grade choir. Band and choir were held at the same time and you could only do one. At the time I wanted to be in choir with all my friends. I wanted to sing. So I made my choice.

That's when it started. The fear. The stage-fright. I was petrified to sing in front of the class. Had to give up a solo in the final concert because my nerves took over. The same thing happened in high school. We were doing a musical theater unit in our acting class and when it came time for performance, the music started, I opened my mouth, and nothing came out. Even singing in church or in groups, I was usually mouthing the words, but not actually making any sound. I don't know why it happened. I sang solos in the youth choir, even sang in my 7th grade talent show...but once 8th grade and high school hit, it all changed. It may have been that, going to a performing arts school, I was suddenly surrounded my some incredible talent. Some of these kids can really blow you away. I guess in my head, I thought, I could never do anything close to what they're doing and I closed up. And it stuck. Since then, I've had this paralyzing fear of singing in front of anyone. Which is terribly sad because its something I love to do. Just for fun. I've never had any desire to sing professionally...just for the joy of it. (Maybe that will be my next self expansion project!) 

However! There is still the car! On any given drive I can be found performing all the parts to my favorite musical or doing solo concerts of my favorite albums. That Prius transforms into my own private world, my own little theater. And it is a joy. My love of theater and my love of music really do go hand in hand. For me, both are about expression. Opening your soul up and see what comes out. And Music...it hits heights that words can't. It takes you places. It comforts you. Inspires you. It can rip you apart and put you back together. 

No ones musical interests are the same...and that's ok. Because we all find what we need. I think we are drawn to the artists that speak for us, that say what we want to say, but can't find the words...or the notes. There are times when listening to your favorite artist is like having a heart to heart with an old friend. A friend who is giving you advice or telling you its all going to be ok. Or making you laugh or letting you cry. And we call upon who we need at the time. There are days when I need to hang out with Miles Davis...days when I want to have coffee with Carole King. There are days when I want to dance with Beatles, protest with Dylan...days when I just need a hug from Garth Brooks! And they are always there. All you have to do is press play...or drop the needle on your record player...or sing out at the top of your lungs going 80 miles an hour down the 134.

In San Diego last weekend, we were dancing the night away at this bar where a pretty excellent DJ was spinning. He was playing everything from Whitney's Dance With Somebody to Bone Thugs N Harmony's Crossroads...a few crowd favorites were Regulate and even the Fresh Prince theme song. All old school. All fantastic. The crowd was going wild and everyone was dancing their hearts out. Then...at the end of the night, he closed his set with that old 90's favorite....Puff Daddy's I'll Be Missing You. We were floored. My friend and I both got a little teary. It was the first time I ever cried at a dance party! But that's what music can do. In an instant, it can take you somewhere, or remind you of someone, or reach way down inside you and grab something...and there's the release. It was a beautiful moment and we talked about it the whole walk home...smiling all the way.

This entire post was inspired because tonight I'm sitting in the recording studio with Check In the Dark as they record another track for the upcoming album. to watch them and the engineers work is absolutely astounding. Sitting up in this booth listening to Mike lay down the guitar part to a song...no vocals yet, just guitar. Hearing it broken down, each little intricacy, every note. Its such an honor to be able to witness this work. It makes you realize just how much goes into it. Music is science, its math, passion, heart, blood, sweat, and tears....all rolled in to one. I am a person lead by my emotions. Some people are lead by their head, some by their gut, me....by my heart. Its one of the best and worst things about me. And music...its emotion, its feeling...made audible.

Day 53: I am grateful for music. For each and every musician that has had the courage to share their work with the world. For every moment of comfort or joy or peace they have provided. For every song that has made me think, feel, or dance. For every note...I am grateful. 

One more story to share before I release you from my ramblings! I am enamored with this band named Dawes. Loved the first album and was so excited to get their second album, Nothing Is Wrong. It was last year sometime. I was getting ready to go somewhere...can't quite remember...and I put on the album. It went with me from the shower to the bedroom, getting dressed and blow-drying my hair. The music was sensational and the energy was infectious. Then, I'm sitting there doing my make-up, and this song comes on. It took a few minutes before I realized that I had completely stopped what I was doing, dropped my mascara on the floor, and was sobbing. This was not the heart-breaking type of sob, this was more of a release. With every word that came out of the speaker, I felt like they were singing directly to me. That this song has been written for me. They were telling my story, they were expressing my heart. They were explaining something to me that I couldn't wrap my head around before. And it was such a release. That moment gave me so much peace. A peace that I very much needed. It eased, ever so slightly, the ache in my heart that I felt ever since my brother passed. And it continues to give me peace each and every time that I hear it. I have no doubt that I will carry this song with me for always. I got a chance to meet Dawes at the Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival this year. They were a little grumpy and a little worse for wear...maybe because they had just landed from Australia the night before...maybe because there were only 4 people in their meet and greet line. But I didn't care. I was just so happy to be there. I wanted to thank them, to express my gratitude. I wanted so badly to tell them about the great gift they had given me. But their mood didn't seem too conducive and I'm sure they had heard it a million times before, especially when it came to that song. So I let the moment pass, had my record signed, took my picture, and walked away. If given another chance, I would tell them. I would thank them....

And I would also have them sign another record since ours was lost/stolen later that night!! 

Anyway...I'm sure you have a song like that. I'm sure everyone does. I hope so. That's the beauty of music. 

The song? It's called A Little Bit Of Everything. I'm not going to post the lyrics or try to shove it down your throat. I'm just going to suggest....maybe give it a listen.